Week 11

As of today, I am 11 weeks and 4 days along. This pregnancy is flying by so far.

In infertility, you tend to live by 2 week incriments, 2 weeks until you ovulate and 2 weeks until you find out if you are pregnant or not. If not, then 2 more weeks until you ovulate again. Of course, there are even smaller timelines in the midst of that. 5 days until my period is over. 5 more days until I get a positive OPK. 2 more days until my temperature (hopefully) rises. 2 weeks until I find out if it all worked. And repeat. In pregnancy, things are not that much different. You know that you are going to be one more week farther along on a certain day each week (Tuesday for me). So, it's a countdown each week to the next Tuesday where I'm one more week into my pregnancy. Each week is exciting (rather than filled with anxiety like in infertility) because it not only means I'm more secure in the health and safety of my baby, but it means that he/she is developing something new and growing bigger and becoming closer and closer to the baby I will hold in my arms in the not so far future. In infertility, though, the cycle keeps repeating itself and your line of sight doesn't go much further than your next cycle. However, in pregnancy, I catch myself having to remember that things are ever-changing each week and that it will all come to an end at a difinitive point where my life will be forever changed.

When I was going through infertility, I thought of having a baby to hold in my arms, but now planning for that baby is a very different process. I seriously have to consider how I am going to configure my schedule for work to balance the needs of my job, the needs of our finances, and the time I desire with our baby. I'm also hoping to start putting the nursery together in a few weeks (when my brother-in-law moves out). So, it's now a matter of taking those visions I once had of decor and making them happen, not only practically, but financially. Instead of holding onto pictures of baby furniture, I've now got to come up with the nearly $300 I need for the crib. None of this is bad, and I don't let it ever stress me out. I know it'll all work out in time and I consider myself to be fortunate during this tough economical time. It's just the practicalities of pregnancy.

As far as how this week has been so far, it's one of the tougher ones that I've experienced. While I have felt less nauseous than I did in the previous 2 weeks, I have actually gotten sick and thrown up everyday this week. At 6:50 am, like clockwork, I have thrown up. Fortunately enough, I don't tend to feel very sick throughout the rest of the day. The only exception being that on Wednesday night, literally 5 minutes after I had eaten a fairly large dinner, I lost it all. I hate throwing up and feeling sick. But I know that so many people have it far worse than I do. One of my best friends was sick everyday until about 3 pm until the day that she gave birth. By the time the baby was born, she had lost more than 20 lbs from her pre-pregnancy weight because of how sick she was. And, more than that, I also know how much I went through to be here. And, at my hardest time, I remember declaring that I would be willing to throw up every single day throughout my entire pregnancy in order to have a baby in the end. I still hold onto that notion. It's worth it. Every bit of it. And I will never complain.

I do think that I've probably lost all of the weight that I gained in the first 7 weeks and am now back to my pre-pregnancy weight. It seems that I haven't gained anymore inches than I already had in my bustline and waist. I adore my maternity clothes, though. They are SO comfortable.

In the baby's development, he/she is now over an inch and 1/2 big. The hands are going to start opening and closing into fists. Little tooth buds are starting to develop under the gums. And the baby is starting to hiccup as its diaphragm starts forming. The baby is already stretching and kicking, even though I can't feel a thing. He/she is starting to explore their own body, touching their head, face, and especially their mouth. Not only are they gaining cordination in this, but their hands are starting to experience the sense of touch. The baby is starting to swallow and smell. This allows the baby to swallow the amniotic fluid and urinate. These aspects of development will help the baby breastfeed in the future. And, finally, I also read that the skin is becoming less transparent, the bones are hardening, and that the baby's eyes are fully open now. I LOVE learning these things. I am amazed weekly at the order in which God knits this baby together. For instance, in one of the very first weeks of pregnancy, the baby's vocal cords start forming, and yet, he/she won't use them for months and months to come. And the lungs are one of the last organs to develop. It all fascinates me, and I love picturing this little one growing inside of me, especially since I can't feel a thing.

I don't have another OB appointment until week 15, on March 4th. At that appointment I will have to decide whether I want the quad genetic screen or not. For those who are also facing this decision, do you have any opinions about it? Are you planning on doing it as well? I just have mixed feelings about it all. I believe that the only other things I'll do at this appointment are another urine test and listen to the heartbeat again. I'm hoping that I can soon begin to hear the heartbeat on the doppler I have at home. I'd love to be able to record it and post it on the computer.

Well, even though it seems like there's something else, that's all I can think of to update on. More to come later...