18 Weeks

Today marks 18 weeks in this pregnancy. I can't believe I'm almost halfway through! The past few weeks (since I last wrote) have been mostly uneventful regarding new developments in my pregnancy. I haven't gained any more weight and am still at a total of +3 lbs. And, I haven't noticed any more inches in my waistline either- still holding at at +6 inches. Every now and then I think I feel a flutter in my stomach, but nothing concrete enough to know for sure. I'm excited to feel it and know for sure that it's genuinely my baby moving and not just an air bubble or something. I'm even more excited for it to begin to show externally too- for Jesse to be able to put his hand on my belly and feel his very first child move around for the first time! The other day, I was poking at my stomach while lying down, trying to see if I could get any movement. I heard another lady on a pregnancy site say this worked for her and she could actually feel it externally with her hands. So, I was poking and prodding. I began to feel a little pulsating feeling, but wasn't sure if it was just my own pulse in my finger tips. So, I called Jesse in and asked him to feel, but he said he couldn't feel anything other than his own pulse. So, nothing yet.

I did rent a fetal heart monitor this week. I bought one off of Craigslist for $15 when I first found out I was pregnant. It's crap! It's one of those that you get from Target originally for about $25. It doesn't have the wand and lotion like the doctor uses. It basically just has a microphone that you hold up to your belly. I read some reviews on it AFTER I bought it and have found that they all seem to be true. Basically, you just hear every gurgle and rumble that goes on in your belly. You hear everything (even the fan whirling around you or the tv in the other room) but you DO NOT hear your baby's heartbeat. The only heartbeat you can faintly hear is your own. I've tried every week since I bought it to listen for the ever-so-slight beating of my baby's heart only to hear my stomach digest everything I've eaten that day. The girl I bought it from said that you had to wait until you were about 4-5 months along (about the time that you would find out the gender of the baby) in order to hear it clearly. Well, I'm right there and I haven't heard anything yet. So, I finally broke down and rented a professional one offline. The biggest reason is that Jesse and I have only been able to listen to the baby's heartbeat two times since finding out that I am pregnant (once at 9 weeks and once at 15 weeks), and both of these times have been for less than a minute each. Jesse's mentioned several times that he would like to hear it for longer and I really want to be able to record it so I can post it online. I am expecting it to come in the mail tomorrow so I'm very excited about that.

I'm even MORE excited that in 9 days I will find out if I'm having a boy or girl. It seems that everyone who's even remotely close to me in their pregnancy has already found out and I am extremely envious! I just want to know! I think it'll make everything seem that much more real, for one thing. I can finally call my baby by a specific name and quit saying "it". I can start buying all of the clothes I have been eyeing and settle on pink or blue baby accessories. In addition to that, Michael should be moving out of our extra bedroom that same week which means that I'll find out just in time to start painting the room and (FINALLY) setting up the crib and hutch. On top of all of those great bonuses, I really want to know because, frankly, I have NO IDEA what I'm having. I have no gut intuition, no strong tendencies, no educated guesses, nothing. When I think about having a boy, I get excited. When I think about having a girl, I get excited. But I feel totally lost at which one seems more likely. I've even considered (not seriously) all of the old wive's tales. Am I carrying high or low? Is my face round and glowing? If I hold a ring on a string above my belly, which way will it swing? What kinds of food am I craving? How much morning sickness have I had. All of these things point to all different conclusions. So, I'm at a loss for an answer. Guess I'll just have to keep waiting 9 more days...

In not so fun news, last Wednesday I had a kinda scary experience. I threw up that morning, as is my daily routine, but this time I threw up blood. I wasn't scared really, but knew that throwing up blood is never a good thing. So I wasn't sure if I should go to the ER or go on to work. I called my doctor's office at 6:30am and talked to the on-call doctor. She said that it's common enough in pregnancy and that my stomach was probably just irritated. She said to not worry about it unless it kept happening. The answer completely sufficed for me. I had several other people confirm that their wives (or they) had also thrown up blood periodically through their pregnancy as well. But the only thing I still have not been sure about is how often is too often. I figured that if I continued to throw up that afternoon (especially if it was bloody) then I needed to get it checked out. It's not normal for me to be sick later in the day- only first thing each morning. If I was fine the rest of that day, but threw up blood the next morning during my daily routine, then I wouldn't be as worried, but still keep an eye on it. The theory being that it could be left over from the day before or my stomach hadn't completely healed. But if this continued for several mornings in a row, then I definitely needed to have it checked out.

Well, I wasn't sick anymore in the afternoons nor did I ever throw up blood again in the mornings... until yesterday. Five days after my original scare, my day began normally. I have the usual morning routine (without any blood) and went about my day perfectly normal. However, I was fighting a very slight headache all day (which we should all know by now makes me nauseous). In addition to that, I had heartburn all day too. Furthermore, I was emotionally upset by the end of my workday as my grandma is not doing well at all. (You can read more about this on my other blog which I'll post later.) Getting all worked up and crying isn't very good for me either when my stomach's already on the fringe. So, then I got home and began cleaning the house as I got ready to have guests over for a Bible study. I went to empty the trash which I discovered I had already gotten sick in once before and that set me over the edge. I lost my entire lunch. I emptied my stomach. And then I threw up blood again. I still wasn't scared, but didn't like seeing that as it adds to the concern. So, I'm keeping track of how often and when it happens, and if it continues to happen frequently enough I will call my doctor again. However, if it's sporadic enough, I will just wait until I see my doctor in 9 days to discuss the issue with her.

In final news, I spent the entire weekend pretending to be a mommy. My best friend Jolyn has a 10 month old daughter who we've frequently babysat, even overnight. However, this weekend, both Jolyn and her husband had to be out of town for the entire weekend as they attended pre-wedding/bachelor(ette) events (Jolyn being the maid of honor and Tim being a groomsman at his sister's wedding). So, we picked up Katelyn (their daughter) at about 3:30pm on Friday after getting off work and we kept her until about 2:00pm on Sunday afternoon. I didn't realize beforehand how busy our weekend was going to be, but we toted Katelyn around to a wedding Friday evening, out to dinner, to a birthday party, and to church throughout the weekend. It wasn't difficult. Both Jesse and I think that Katelyn is extremely easy to care for and we would do the same with our own baby. We both have very strong parenting styles defined by continuing to live our own lives in which the baby will adapt to. We thoroughly enjoyed our weekend practicing to be parents. We worked together to get her dressed for church and to go to sleep when she was fussy. We experienced what it's like to have a baby at a restaurant with us who keeps sliding in their highchair or wants to touch everything on the table while you are trying to eat. We learned how un-babyproof our house is and how she will pick up every little crumb or piece of paper off of the floor and try to eat it. Jesse learned what to do if a baby is choking on their food. He also got spit up on for the first time and (surprisingly!) said he didn't care. It didn't bother him. He has yet to change a poopy diaper, though. We both enjoyed having someone who got excited every time you walked into the room. And, we worked together on changing her diaper since she's extremely squirmy and likes to roll over in the midst of it. I even got a picture of her sleeping with him while I was in the shower. We both laid in bed the next night and agreed, we're ready for this in our life.